Bazi Analysis | Three Steps to finding Harmony, Happiness and Love.
“When do you enjoy spending family time together the most?” I asked my son after dinner one night. “When we Cho Dai Di*,” he replied playfully.
It was hard to imagine that we were involved in a heated argument just the night before. I guess this is what we term 血浓于水 (blood is thicker than water). After years of consultation work (learning from both my own and clients’ experiences), besides utilizing Feng Shui and Bazi principles to help us in having better health, harmony and prosperity at home, I have discovered three vital steps to achieve congruence and joy with the feelings of love by our closed ones whether at home, with friends and at times, even at work.
1. Keep an open mind.
To feel the love from our friends, family and loved ones, the first and most important thing is to receive their gesture or words with an open mind without prejudice. If we pre-judge a person, listen to what we only want to hear, often times we will misconstrue the message causing us anguish, distress and unhappiness.
“The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” … Helen Keller
“To love is nothing. To be loved is something. But to love and be loved, that’s everything.”… T. Tolis
2. Appreciate and listen from others’ perspective.
Next, it is important to understand things and what others are trying to say from their perspective. Just the other day, I was watching a TV programme where scientists have proven that all humans have compassion. But if we do not understand why someone may be hurling angry words at us and complaining about their situation, we may not be able to extend this compassion and understanding to see things from their perspective. However, if we are able to put ourselves in their shoes (made easier with Bazi profiling), we will be able to show empathy and be more considerate in our communication bringing about harmony in our relationships whether at home, in a social setting or at work.
“No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.” …Theodore Roosevelt
“When you show deep empathy toward others, their defensive energy goes down, and positive energy replaces it. That’s when you can get more creative in solving problems.”…Stephen Covey
3. Happiness is not how much we have, but how we learn to enjoy and be contented.
Finally, “happiness is a mental state of well-being characterised by positive emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy.” We feel happy when we are confident, satisfied or contented. We can also feel happy for ourselves or others when we or they make significant achievements in life (e.g. getting married, having babies, etc.) or in our or their careers or other educational, business or life achievements.** Often, it is not how much we have, but how we learn to be content and enjoy what we currently have, that makes happiness.
“One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.” …Rita Mae Brown
“Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they didn’t stop to enjoy it.”… William Feather
Written in loving memory of my mum (28 Sep 1940 – 15 Apr 2016).
Janet Yung (amazon.com/author/janetyung)
Feng Shui and Bazi Consultant. Author. Harmony Adviser.
* A strategy card game where players aim to be the first to finish distributing all their cards
** Excerpt from my first book – “Being Happy and Successful at Work and In Your Career”